lost_judi

Illegitimate Daughter of Art and Science

2008-08-01T13:05:19Z

Yes, I do live, altho I have been mostly-dead all day...

I hope to be officially moved into my new home this weekend, even tho I think it will take years to get everything moved and unpacked. I've decided that if I ever have to move again, I'll just have an open house yard sale and sell everything except my art stuff and cat. But, thankfully, I think I'll be in my new home for several years to come.

It looks like the first part of August should be fairly calm, just packing and moving and unpacking. There is GenCon in Indy coming up but I may only go up there for a day, if at all. The end of the month is Dragon*Con, my last chance this year to hug my southern friends and my only chance to see my favorite band, Abney Park, perform. Then nothing until October when my sister-in-law and I are supposed to take a roadtrip up to Maine to meet my long-lost brother. That's going to be weird...

Once things get settled at home I should be able to put more time into creating some artwork. I'm not sure how many con artshows I can get to next year, it depends on how much money I have left after bills, but I want to have more (and better!) stuff.

And Amanda mentioned last night that we need to start planning our Halloween party, since Halloween will be on a Friday (nice!) we can have a serious party. We can break in our built-in bar in the basement.

All in all, life is good and much better than the alternative.

Oh, the subject line is actually a line from an Abney Park tune, "Herr Drosselmeyer's Doll". LOVE their new album!!

Is it bad...

2008-06-05T23:17:40Z

...when you check your LiveJournal and find that you have 278 Unread Messages? And, it says I last updated 28 weeks ago. Alas, I have neglected my poor LJ page and all of my lovely cyber-friends. I am such a bad, bad person. Please, beat me with a wet noodle. Repeatedly. I deserve it. And, I like it!

Too much going on in my life right now, but I remind myself that it is better to be busy than bored. There's the upcoming art shows at Hypericon and Inconjunction, the art show scene for "1916 Productions" low-budget horror movie, an illustration for the next issue of Apex, four art commissions that are waaaay overdue, creating graphics for an online video game, and the whole buying-a-house-and-moving thing. But, these are all good things!

When Life is Good, it is very Good. When Life is Bad, it is still better than the Alternative.

And how is everyone? Wonderful, I hope.

- j

Letter to Santa

2007-11-17T13:45:10Z

Dear Santa...

Dear Santa,

This year I've been busy!

In March I gave 9fingers a life-saving blood transfusion (50 points). In August moon1 and I robbed a bank (-50 points). In February I gave robert_from_ap a wet willie, then I took it back (-5 points). In April I signed my organ donor card (28 points). In May I pulled nathan_fhtagn's hair (-5 points).

Overall, I've been nice (18 points). For Christmas I deserve a wedgie!

Sincerely,
lost_judi

Low

2007-07-22T01:18:42Z

Sometimes I'm a little slow...

I just realized today that I'm depressed. Now I've been fighting with depression since puberty so you'd think I would have recognized that demon when I saw it, but no. It's not like it was, not the frustration, the anger, the self-hate, the thoughts of suicide...this has a new face. This depression is fatigue and sorrow and lack of energy. This is just wanting to lay down and do nothing until death comes for me. No, I'm not suicidal. That would take too much energy. It just feels like all light and life is gone from me and I'm empty.

How long does this go on?

Musings...

2006-12-31T22:15:02Z

On this eve of a new year, I'm taking a couple of minutes to reflect on this passing year. I can sum up 2006 with this oft-used quote; "It was the best of times. It was the worst of times".

On the level of artistic achievement, career and social endeavors, it was the best of times. I've been published several times in Apex Digest, had my art displayed at places other the convention art shows, met many truely wonderful people and have garnered a great deal of personal satisfaction in helping to promote Apex and my fellow artists.
At my 'real job' I was promoted and moved into the IT department. Now I'm working with two amazing individuals and am learning computer programming and website design and development. Coding and design make my brain happy. It satisfies both my urges to learn how things work and that over-whelming urge to create.

But the worst of times...that has managed to suck the joy out of my life these past few months. It has also altered my perspective on life, death and all the things that we consider to be important. I'm striving to enjoy my life and to learn from my failures, to ignore the hurts, and to never stop trying to reach for the goals that make me happy. And the things in life that are most important are family and friends. All other 'things' are replaceable. Nothing else can create such joy or sorrow as we experience with those people that we love.

No resolutions for 2007. Just a promise to myself to continue to love and care for those people that I love, and to spread my wings and discover if I can fly.

Horrorscope for December 25th

2006-12-25T16:01:28Z

Capricorn December 22 - January 19

Daily Extended Forecast for December 25, 2006
Provided by Astrology.com

It's a good time to build up your self-esteem in terms of expressing yourself. Deep down inside, you're a very creative person, and today is a good day to let that show. Get involved in planning or cooking a meal, and volunteer to set the table. You can arrange the settings in a unique way -- let yourself do something that strikes people as downright odd. It's all part of encouraging yourself to take chances and express your natural talents.

lost_judi @ 2006-12-24T22:33:00

2006-12-25T03:36:46Z

I find the coolest stuff on other people's pages...

Your Birthdate: January 3

You are certain and confident when you choose to love someone.
Even though your romantic choices may be unconventional - you stand behind them.
Your friends never know you as well as a romantic partner does.

Number of True Loves You'll Have: 3

Number of Times You'll Have Your Heart Broken: 5

You are most compatible with people born on the 3rd, 12th, 21st, and 30th of the month.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean For Your Love Life?

Christmas

2006-12-25T03:11:02Z

Christmas with family and friends...it doesn't get any better than this.

Our family friend, Sandy, drove down from Indy to be with us. My big brother came downstairs and was made comfortable on the couch. My niece Amanda's boyfriend, Joe, showed up as well as her sister, Cathy. Jan did all the cooking and did a fantastic job, as usual. We all had dinner then spend two hours opening and 'oohing' over presents. Both Cathy and Amanda got webcams. (Cyberspace Beware!). We all got a nice pile of booty. I'm happy with everything I received, tho the only thing I really wanted for Christmas was for my brother to be healthy. Since he is doing much better now, I feel as tho this has been the best Christmas I have ever had.

Now if only all of my friends and the other members of my family can be happy and healthy this Christmas, I will do backflips of joy! OK, maybe not a backflip. But there will be joy!

Four Questions

2006-12-25T02:25:00Z

I was reminded that I need to offer to answer four questions about myself in return for asking four questions. So, ask away! I shall endeveaour to answer honestly since I have no political aspirations.

I don't like the sound of this...

2006-12-11T22:46:10Z

You are The Tower

Ambition, fighting, war, courage. Destruction, danger, fall, ruin.

The Tower represents war, destruction, but also spiritual renewal. Plans are disrupted. Your views and ideas will change as a result.

The Tower is a card about war, a war between the structures of lies and the lightning flash of truth. The Tower stands for "false concepts and institutions that we take for real." You have been shaken up; blinded by a shocking revelation. It sometimes takes that to see a truth that one refuses to see. Or to bring down beliefs that are so well constructed. What's most important to remember is that the tearing down of this structure, however painful, makes room for something new to be built.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.